I Can Take This
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
I sit down with my friend Miss Ivy League! We talk about the difference between stripping and burlesque, funny burlesque names, pregnancy and the sex-drive, being a kinky parent, being a poly parent and just being all around awesome (her not me). Fing her on Facebook here http://www.facebook.com/missivyleague On fetlife under the name nex0s Her fetlife group https://fetlife.com/groups/16992 Her alt parents…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
Sade returns to the show. Knowing someone so well makes interviewing them surprisingly difficult so we opened up the interview to your questions. We talk threesomes, limits on playing with others, orgasms, marriage, the NYC fashion industry, ramping up a D/s relationship and a bunch more. Plus, friend of the show Sinclair is bringing back…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
Morgana Maye is back on the show! We talk about BDSM as therapy, how kink is perceived in the medical community, guild and shame, how to play with someone on a deeper level, the DSM and a bunch more. Find Morgana on her website MistressMorgana.com and on Twitter @MorganaMaye Also, friend of the show Midori is giving…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
This episode I sit down with Mistress Wynter and we talk about finding kink, biker bars, false advertising at sex events, the genesis and the drive of fetishes, when service isn’t really service and more. As usual you can find her link in the links section. Your donations are always helpful and right now will…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
The Violent Fems sit down for a way too brief talk on the genesis of the group, their alter egos, beating boys up and a whole lot more. You can find them at www.violentfems.com The fems are: Mistress Alex mistressalexnyc.com Ms Regan Black msreganblack.com Mistress Trish mistresstrish.net Mistress Veronica mistressveronicanyc.com Mistress Wynter mswynter.com https://media.blubrry.com/sex/newcast.s3.amazonaws.com/masocast108.mp3Podcast: Play…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
A conversation with my good friend Goddess Coko. Â She talks about why some submissive men are whiney bitches, why some call her a badge bunny, TES, and more. Leave a comment, email, voicemail or donation at masocast.com A conversation with my good friend Goddess Coko. Â She talks about why some submissive men are…
Podcast: Play in new window | Download | Embed
Subscribe: Apple Podcasts | Android | RSS
Comments are closed.
A great and awesome episode! I am very sympathetic about the guest’s situation, and as he says, he’s “fairly new” to it (I’m not sure what that means, time-wise) and he just came out to his therapist. Way to go there!
But I’m going to channel my inner Dan Savage now. Your guest says he doesn’t want to jeopardize his marriage. But you know what, he’s jeopardizing it. Here he is being (re)born, finding out who he is and being so changed that people remark on it. It is arguably one of the more important times in his life – and he’s not sharing it with his wife. His wife needs to know. She needs to be able to share this with him, as well, this road of discoveries. From the sidelines or directly, who knows. I was surprised to hear that they had already been tying each other up – there must be a certain openness there.
But your guest, of course, needs to be able to own it, too. Because it’s clear that he would not stop if she demanded it, and he must be able to say that. If the relationship really is as great as the guest says, then the wife will probably also hesitate before leaving him. But at least he would have been honest instead of her finding out years later that all this has been going on behind her back, that her newly confident husband became so by lying to her.
I know this is armchair reasoning, and I hope your guest will talk to his therapist about finding the right moment, but I don’t think he should wait many months or even years. Some day, he will come home with marks that can’t be excused away, or a bill will turn up, or…
That said, I think it’s awesome that the guest made the steps to find out about him, that he is on this journey, and the fact that he told his therapist is a good sign that he won’t keep it to himself forever.
I didn’t catch the name of your guest but it’s wonderful to hear someone who is so honest with himself. It takes a fair amount of bravery to take such a big step.
Great podcast! I enjoyed this one (almost) as much as the ones where I learn more about the Dommes. Very honest and open and reminded me of the excitement I feel. Well done!
I disagree with Patrick a bit. Having listening to just about all of Dan Savage’s podcasts in the last month and a half, Dan would say to approach your wife and assess her acceptance. He did that and was shut down. So Dan would say to “do what you gotta do”, sometimes that is what it takes to save a marriage. Sometimes there is an implicit don’t ask don’t tell policy, and sometimes it is purely behind the back. We might also say to take baby steps with the wife; nipple sucking moving to tweaking, to pinching, etc., over a course of months or years.
I’m not sure that married guys who play w/o spouses are always welcome in the leather community, as stated in the podcast. Some lifestyle groups and others don’t want them because of risks of a wife finding out, going ballistic, and punishing the group. But Sade was right on with her view of coming out submissive vs dominant — that was a real show highlight!
Again, awesome podcast!
Wow. I am so incredibly torn by this Masocast.
I am positively thrilled for your guest, that he is finally finding an outlet and exploring his nature after a lifetime of denial. The sense of wonderment in his voice is unequivocal. It’s hard to take even the first step of his journey, and I sense the impact it has on him from his voice.
(Disclaimer: I am a judgmental asshole.)
On the other hand, I think he’s setting himself up on a collision course with his wife. He’s cheating on her, plain and simple. The cheating may not be intercourse, but it’s certainly something more intimate and sexual than he is getting from his wife. No matter what story he is telling himself to get through this, there will likely be a day of reckoning with his spouse.
The truth is, he’s in a bad situation. He loves his wife, and yet he feels unfulfilled in the relationship. He’s tested the waters with her, and it sounds like she’s been pretty clear. My prediction – it will end in tears.
I’m glad he’s working through so much of this with a therapist. It helps to have a trusted source to get these things off your chest, to say out loud all those things you’ve been unable to say. Still, I think the generally permissive attitude of the therapist (“If it’s good for you, I’m good with it”) is a load of permissive crap.
This situation will never net out to something as simple as good or bad. Your guest is faced with a terrible decision – a sucker’s choice as it were: keep the marriage that he treasures, or go get his kink on and express his inner self.
And whether or not he admits it, he’s already made the choice. I wish him luck in telling his wife.
Not my favorite Masocast, but damn, it made me think.
Keep up the good work, and let us know how it turns out for your guest!
Jeffrey
Axe,
This interview and your guest are a great compliment to your already stellar archive. Please keep up the good work! That being said, I am happy to hear this story because I thought I was the only guy that had this type of a problem, what a relief. There is so much similarity to my situation and your guest’s that I felt I was looking in the mirror. I have been dealing with this for almost 4 years now and it has been quite a ride. There have been many great empowering experiences and many days filled with doubt and remorse. Overall things have balanced out, but the question remains; “Am I making the right choice”? Hopefully one day I will know the right answer but for now the direction I am heading works for me.
This was a wonderful podcast! One of the best yet! Axe asks the hard questions and the interviewee is an extremely candid and enthusiastic subject!
I enjoyed this one so much I posted an entry about it on my blog: http://hermajestysplaything.blogspot.com/2010/07/i-can-take-this.html
Keep up the good work Axe and thank you to Mistress Sade for posting about this on The Hang.
Warm regards to you both!
HMP
Kudos to you, Axe, for gracefully taking on a tricky interview, and to your guest for forthrightly sharing his ongoing evolution.